


Salem is Out of Touch with the Youth

by OnlyTheResults



Category: RWBY
Genre: Gen, Wednesday Writing Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-19
Updated: 2020-02-19
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:20:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22806976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OnlyTheResults/pseuds/OnlyTheResults
Summary: Salem requires help from Dr. Watts after discovering something curious from Emerald's twitter account. Sadly, she's not as savvy with the internet as she is all powerful. (Written for /r/RWBY's Writing Prompt Wednesday)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	Salem is Out of Touch with the Youth

"Dr. Watts!" Salem called as she entered the good doctors laboratory deep within the confines of her castle in the Everknight. Unlike the moralistic grandstanding of Atlas, Salem provided him with every tool to exercise his science. From Grimm, to live test subjects to experimental tools, Arthur Watts has everything he could have desired in the realm of scientific inquiry.

He looked up from his seat, shutting off his custom scrolls playlist of Atlesian operatic music. He might have been spurned by the kingdom, but that didn't mean he didn't appreciate the classics. He was in a good mood, especially given the fact Cinder and her posse were at Beacon.

"Yes ma'am?" he asked, giving her the due deference she demanded. The ancient woman practically flew into the lab. In her hand was a scroll.

Arthur paled.

"Dr. Watts. I require your experience with technology."

Arthur's good mood evaporated in an instant. Salem and technology never went well. He swore he'd gained several gray hairs trying to set up a social media account for Salem, as well as godsforsaken wi-fi in the castle. She still needed help with the most mundane actions, like using Twitter or messaging her other lieutenants.

He braced himself. "Is it about the Black Queen Virus? I told Cinder all she needs to do is get it to an access point and leave the rest to me" the man said through gritted teeth. With simple magic she let her scroll float towards Arthur. He plucked it out of the air and looked at the screen. It was Twitter, but more specifically it was under #Beacon. He could see Emerald's account posting a picture of Ozpin with the caption of "Ok, Boomer."

He looked back up at Salem before looking back down. "I'm unsure as to what the issue is, ma'am."

Salem scowled. "Young Emerald has posted a series of such things, all related to the professors of Beacon. Port. Goodwitch. Oobleck. She calls them... memes..."

She flicked her wrist and her scroll flew back to her. Arthur wasn't the most religious man, but it was these moments he wished the Brother Gods were still here to hear his prayer.

"They seem to harness power against them. These words. These... memes... Is there a way that you can utilize them more efficiently?"

For the first time in his life, the esteemed and genius Dr. Arthur Watts, felt regret for ever faking his death and leaving Atlas.

"Ah. I see..." he began slowly, thinking of something, anything to say. "I don't believe they are weapons ma'am. Memes are... jokes... within the younger generation" he tried to explain as he adjusted his black tie.

Wait. More efficiently?

Watts quickly checked his custom scroll, swiping through Twitter until he found Salem's faux-account under the name of 'Selene.'

Oh no... he thought. Countless of memes. Bad memes. Memes that are out of touch.

Boomer memes

"Jokes, Dr. Watts? Are you certain?"

"Yes... very certain..."

He slipped his scroll back into his pocket. "Well... then I suppose we may re-strategize with these so called memes. To find and recruit new agents."

Watts considered the idea. The White Fang had used similar ideas in the past to some effect, but he didn't think Salem had the savvy to do so.

Salem had caught on to the fact he was holding something back. "Arthur. Speak freely." Her voice carried dark command.

"Of course ma'am... I simply think... that your 'memes' are... possibly out of touch with the youth." He swiped his hand, activating a few of his rings to bring up a screen showcasing Salem's twitter account, alongside Emeralds. It seemed like the girl had quite the following on the web.

"As you can see, Emerald's 'memes' are at a higher like and retweeted ratio. Yours however..."

Two likes at best. No retweets. Nothing. One comment. It said "Ok boomer." With the click of his ring he had all the information about that user. A student of Beacon by the name of Yang Xiao-Long. He could see Salem's eye twitch.

"Are they calling me old?"

"And out of touch."

Her eye twitched again. "I have seen countless generations of youth over centuries. I know more about the youth of each generation more than anyone!"

Dr. Watts could only nod in despair. "Find more memes to post for me, Dr. Watts!" she commanded with a growl. "Then we shall see who is 'out of touch'!"

There was another comment on one of her boomer memes. It was Emerald.

All it said was "Ok, boomer."

Salem twitched her eye as tendrils of darkness spread from the ground. The Grimm test subjects he had were wailing loudly as the entire laboratory shook. Vials, equipment and countless bits of Watt's precious lab were shattered and broken.

She raged further as she exited Watt's lab in a rage, leaving it a destroyed mess.

Watts sighed. "I bet Pietro doesn't have to deal with this..."


End file.
